THE GREAT ZOMBIE ADVENTURE

You steal a sailboat from a poor fisherman while he’s distracted trying not to let his family starve and you sail off to Iceland. You encounter heavy storms and icebergs, but because you are a perfect sailor, you do not even break a sweat.

You arrive in Iceland and climb onto the snow-covered beach. You peer around and, over the distant sand dune, see a band of Vikings atop talking polar bears. They approach you, their horned helmets glimmering in the bright winter sun.

“Greetings!” booms one of the polar bears when they stop in front of you. “Welcome to Iceland, home of the Vikings!”

“Hello,” you say, politely. “Are any of you zombies!”

“Heavens no!” booms of the polar bear, and the Viking atop his back chuckles heartily, as if you’ve told a joke.

“England,” you say valiantly. “I’ve come to escape the plague that rips through the world, turning us all into zombies. Can you help me?”

“Of course! Come!”